Letter to Angela (angels)

Of all my children you were the most talented because you had all the qualities of your father and me but unfortunately also all our faults and that’s why you were our favorite because we had to ensure that you never go on the bad side.
Unfortunately, the sad day when I sent you on a diplomatic mission that went so bad that you came back hurt, enraged but ready to go back then when you asked for a small army, we immediately knew that nothing could stop you except to satisfy your vengeance.
When you came back with your bloody trophy and a new alliance I knew you had everything like me rocked into your dark side.

It was to avoid this that I directed you to diplomacy and not to strategy but already as a young you were a brilliant child, curious exploring all corners of the palace and moving into it without ever getting noticed. And that’s how I understood that you had the prescient gifts of an oracle but without training or drugs to help you develop them you had a chance to escape my sad fate.

Because I had to become an oracle but I failed the ultimate test and was expelled by my own mother from our temple. I was enraged and I enrolled in the Vegan army, the most powerful army at the time and one of the few still able to support the old wavering empire. My anger made me a seasoned but bloodthirsty warrior. But the more I fought, the more nightmares came to haunt my nights. I saw horrible things, a hopeless future so I wanted to check if they were premonitions and for that I needed drugs reserved for oracles and only available in their temples for their professional use.

I tried by all means to get some, I even asked my mother but her answer was NO !. The illegal ways also were powerless to procure me, but a notorious smuggler who pompously called himself the Prince of Thieves succeeded in it. But he imposed his conditions and we had to meet in a neutral and secret place, in addition to demanding to attend their use. I wanted to refuse but he did not want to give in and I had to accept his conditions.

It went very badly because my worst nightmares had been confirmed and my mind was going to collapse. But instead of dying I woke up in the temple of my childhood, cared for by my mother. She told me that she had tried to erase my premonitions but now that my mind was no longer trained for that it was difficult without my agreement. I wanted so much to be delivered that I would have accepted but as they were real premonitions and I could not ignore them. So my mother explored with me and one by one she explained to me what was to happen.
So we came to the death of the Great Oracle and asked him if and when it should happen. Her response was sad: it’s been five years since he died and we must handle the disaster as best we can.

I replied, but if he saw the future, how did he not foresee his death? His death he has seen for millennia and has planned a replacement plan. I asked then why not activate it and she replied that it was impossible for them, the oracles. And that I was the only one able to start this plan because when I had spared the man that I had to kill in my test I had just sealed his fate. He would become the future emperor and bring security back to the empire, but he had to be protected because his enemies would kill him before he succeeded and I had to do it and even marry him to do it.

He would be the patriarch of an imperial dynasty and would be the father of many children. But then I told her that I will never submit to the will of such a man and give him a brood of brats. To which she replied that his warlike wife would be replaced by an empress, the mother of his children to the great relief of all, including you.

I had not understood then that I would play this dual role, thinking to leave room for a political marriage to ensure the survival of the empire. It was difficult but we succeeded and finally we fell in love with your father and me, he who was also the smuggler who had trapped me on the order of oracles in exchange for a better future.

Then I became a mother and it was he who had to fight in my place with more subtlety. But when you were very young the death of your big brother made everything rock, I wanted to go fight but he dissuaded me because we needed a strong warrior to protect our children while he was finally exploding his rage contained since his childhood. He would hit hard, hit fair and hit again and again to the extent that our enemies were disorganized and their beautiful plans collapsed as he threatened their allies who, surprised at his fury, stopped giving them their help. Soon they had to flee or perish while I was forming alliances with our potential allies.

We fought on two levels and frightened those who believed us weak and this new strength allowed us to federate former members of the empire who had separated from them because they saw strong rulers able to protect them.
It was a short lull because the empire remained to be rebuilt and its enemies were numerous. If I was then so austere it was because I spent my time containing my rage to go fight to speed things up but I knew it would not help because we had to consolidate instead of expanding and diplomacy would be a way to go.

That’s why I was so proud of you and your diplomatic victories and even your victories as a warrior because you reminded me that I had been but I had been worried that you drown in dark violence of which your father  had saved me. I encouraged you to technical design, one of your youthful pleasures, and also to guide you to the study of the chaotic zone that you have transformed into a fortress and a trap.

You also had the gift of coming back and winning crucial battles but I had to force each time to erase you in front of the imperial diplomacy but you remained my asset in reserve because as much you were feared, as much you were admired as a warrior and I you have used it as a scarecrow for our enemies as a protector for our allies. And it worked well.

Even when I sent you as a diplomat and engineer to demonstrate your Pions to help and win a potential ally, it was the warrior who prevailed to the surprise of all.

And when your father died you knew by your victories show our enemies that we were not weak but able to defend our allies and to fight our enemies.
And that’s why at the approach of my death I chose you to succeed me because you incarnated for all a protectress who was fear of her enemies.

Your people you chose to protect in your fortress also reassured me of your abilities to be a merciful leader. And even if I did not appreciate that you leave to my mother the education of your girls it happened for the best because it knew how to channel their gifts of premonitions to avoid them the Cassandre syndrome which I suffered and which only showed me disastrous futures except after your father’s love delivered me.

Be happy! Watch over your girls! Watch over the Empire! Watch over you! You have been loved, have been feared, loved and feared, but one day you will only be loved and your legend will be feared because it was my last vision.

– Your mother who has always loved you despite our differences.



A propos Gerdesilets

Me lire et rire ou me maudire ou encore périr quel choix est pire? j'ai trouvé mon épitaphe: Il a essayé d'être humoriste, philosophe, poète et auteur de science fiction mais nul dans ces quatre domaines il n'a percé dans aucun :( Mes poèmes sont mauvais mais sarcastiques Ma science fiction est squelettique comparée à ce que j'ai imaginé pour le reste j'aime critiquer https://www.facebook.com/gerdesilets
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